A first grader comes home and announces to his father that he had sex with his
teacher.

Well, his father's chest just swells with pride and he says to his son, "I was
a freshman in college before I had sex with my teacher. I'm proud of you, son.
You know that bicycle that you've been wanting for so long? I'm going to take
you out and buy it for you today."

His son says, "Well, if it's all the same to you, dad, I'd rather go tomorrow.
My butt's still sore."