From an ex-field sales/support survivor:
 
 I used to work in a computer store and one day we had a gentleman call in with
 a smoking power supply. The service rep was having a bit of trouble convincing
 this guy that he had a hardware problem.
 
 Service Rep: Sir, something has burned within your power supply.
 
 Customer:    I bet that there is some command that I can put into the
              AUTOEXEC.BAT that will take care of this.
 
 Service Rep: There is nothing that software can do to help you with this
	      problem.
 
 Customer:    I know that there is something that I can put in... some command.
	      maybe it should go into the CONFIG.SYS.
 
              [After a few minutes of going round and round]
 
 Service Rep: Okay, I am not supposed to tell anyone this but there is a hidden
	      command in some versions of DOS that you can use. I want you to
	      edit your AUTOEXEC.BAT and add the last line as C:\DOS\NOSMOKE
	      and reboot your computer.
 
              [Customer does this]
 
 Customer:    It is still smoking.
 
 Service Rep: I guess you'll need to call Microsoft and ask them for a patch
	      for the NOSMOKE.EXE.
 
              [The customer then hung up. We thought that we had heard the last
	       of this guy but NO... he calls back four hours later]
 
 Service Rep: Hello Sir, how is your computer?
 
 Customer:    I called Microsoft and they said that my power supply is
              incompatible with their NOSMOKE.EXE and that I need to get a new
	      one. I was wondering when I can have that done and how much it
	      will cost...