TYPES OF PENIS ============== The Nuprin Penis: Little, Yellow, Different. The Equal Penis: Tastes like Sugar. The Raid Penis: Kills bugs dead. The Excedrin Penis: It's tthhhhiiiiiiissss big. The Sprite Penis: Image is nothing... Taste is everything. The Snickers Penis: It satisfies you. The Alkaseltzer Penis: Pop, pop, fizz, fizz... Oh, what a relief it is... The Magnavox Penis: Smart. Very Smart. The Life Call Penis: It's fallen and it can't get up. The American Express Penis: Don't leave home without it. The Tootsie Roll Pop Penis: How many licks DOES it take? The Pringles Penis: Once you pop, you can't stop. The M&M Penis: Melts in your mouth, not in your hand. The Frosted Flakes Penis: They're GGGRRRRRREEEEAAAAATTT! The Lucky Charms Penis: They're magically delicious. The Energizer Penis: It keeps going and going... The Metra Penis: The way to REALLY fly. The Right Guard Penis: Anything less is uncivilized. The Jolly Green *Giant* Penis: Self-explanatory The Cambells Soup Penis: mmm mmm good The Purple Pickle Penis: heh heh The Rabid Wombat Penis: Just kidding, Jason. The Kix Penis: kid tested, mother approved. The McDonald's Penis: Over 8 billion served. The McDonald's Penis II: Have you had your break today? The Tombstone Penis: What would you like on your penis? The Ragu Penis: Comes out chunkier than the rest. The Chips Ahoy Penis: Betcha bite a chip. (huh?) The Cobain Penis: It blows itself away. The Purdue Penis: More meat, less bone. The All State Penis: You're in good hands. The 7-Up Penis: The UN-penis. The Nike Penis: Just do it. The Borden Penis: It's GOT to be good. The Barq's Penis: The one with bite. The Beef Penis: It's what's for dinner. The Bud Lite Penis: Great taste, less filling. The Subway Penis: Where fresh is the taste. The Kentucky Fried Chicken Penis: Everybody needs a little. The Life Penis: Mikey likes it. The Transformers Penis: It's more than meets the eye. The Twizzler Penis: It makes mouths happy. The Nintendo Penis: Now you're playing with power. The Sega Penis: PENIS! The Robutussin Penis: Used by nine out of ten moms. The Robutussin Penis II: Recommended by Dr. Mom. The Crest Penis: Recommended by 3 out of 4 dentists. The Champion Penis: The official penis of the '96 USA olympic team. The Starburst Penis: The juice is loose. The Toyota Penis: I love what you do for me. The THX Penis: Bwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! The CitiBank Visa Penis: It's everywhere you want to be. The Timex Penis: Takes a lickin and keeps on. Burger King Penis: Have it your way. Dairy Queen Penis: hot eats, cool treats (we treat you right) The Army Penis: Be all that you can be. The Uncle Sam Penis: We want you. The Milk Penis: It does a body good. (Got penis?) The Flintstone's Vitamins Penis: 10 million strong and growing. The Wendy's Penis: Where's the beef? The Wizard of Oz Penis: "Oh my!" The Captain Planet Penis: Go PENIS! The Folger's Crystals Penis: It's freeze dried to seal in the freshness. AND - the best part of waking up is a penis in your cup. The Lays Penis: Betcha can't eat just one. The Mr. Clean Penis: Is it wet or is it dry? The Diet Coke Penis: Just for the taste of it... The DoubleMint Penis: Chewing really satisfies. The JuicyFruit Penis: The taste is gonna move ya. The Big Red Penis: It's longer with big red. The Matthew Sweet Penis: 100% pure fun. The Millikin Penis: Big blue. The Neon Penis: Hi. The Little Caesar's Penis: Penis! Penis! or Pleaser! Pleaser! The Generic Penis: One size fits all. The Rave Music Penis: Ya'll ready for this? The Mortal Kombat Penis: Nothing can prepare you. The Bounty Penis: The quicker picker-upper. The Pizza Hut Penis: Makin' it great. The Street Fighter II Penis: Matt, stop, you're getting too good at this. The Bounce Penis: With Static-Guard! The Domino's Pizza Penis: Delivers in 30 min or less. The Monty Python Penis: "Isn't awfully nice to have a penis?" The Monty Python Penis II: "Every sperm is sacred..." The Budweiser Penis: This bud's for you. The Siskel & Ebert Penis: 2 thumbs up. The Lava Lamp Penis: hee hee hee!!! The George of the Jungle Penis: watch out for that... tree? The Nyquil Penis: The nighttime coughing, sneezing, runny-nose, itching, burning, so you can't rest penis. The Rice Krispies Penis: What does your penis say to you? The Extra Penis: Lasts an extra extra extra long time. Wonder Bubbles Penis: Magic wand inside! Wonder Bubbles Penis II: For ages 3 and up The Phantom of the Opera Penis: Music of the night The Webster's Thesaurus Penis: How many words are there for penis? The Charmin Penis: Don't squeeze the penis! The Sears Penis: Come see the brighter side. The Jewel Penis: Take a new look at an old friend. The C&C Music Factory Penis: Makes you go hmmmmm... The Rick James Penis: It's SUPERFREAKY. The Gilette Penis: The best a man can get. The Charmin Double Roll Penis: It lasts longer because it IS longer. The Bacardi Penis: Taste the feeling. The MacIntosh Penis: Power is everything. The Borg Penis: Resistance is futile. The Edge Shaving Cream Penis: Ultimate closeness, ultimate comfort. The Beatles Penis: Now a quarter smaller than it used to be. The Oasis Penis: Thinks it's the beatles penis. The Jell-O Penis: Look at it wiggle, look at it jiggle. The Virginia Slims Penis: You've come a long way, baby. The AT&T Penis: Reach out and touch someone. The Highlander Penis: In the end, there can be only one. The Secret Penis: Strong enough for a man, ph balanced for a woman. The Secret Penis II: Strong enough for a man, but made for a woman. The Micro Machines Penis: A whole world in the palm of your hand. The Ertl Penis: Just like the real thing, only smaller. The Sanka Penis: Good to the last drop. The Swiss Miss Penis: The taste you can enjoy anytime, anywhere! The "Mine Is Better Syndrome Penis": My penis is bigger than your penis. The Payday Penis: It's almost totally nuts! The Yellow Pages Penis: Let your fingers do the walkin. The Sony Play Station Penis: You are not ready. The Heinz Penis: Good things come to those who wait. The Hinz Penis: 2 and half inches of terror. The Reese's Penis: How do you eat your Reese's? The Beavis Penis: Look! It's changing color! The Life Savers Penis: Five fruity flavors. The Star Wars Penis: Use the Force, Luke! The Invasion of the Body Snatchers Penis: "They're here already! You're next. YOU'RE NEXT!" The War of the Worlds Penis: "The time came when the Martians looked upon our penis with envious eyes, and slowly but surely turned their plans against us." The Windows '95 Penis: If you ask it to do too much, it'll crash. The Kenny Rodgers Penis: Very very hairy. The Rush Limbaugh Penis: Bald and fat. The Millikin E-mail Penis: I should be doing work, but this is so fun! The Janet Jackson Penis: What Have You Done For ME Lately? Milli-Penis: It doesn't work most of the time. Health Services Penis: Ummm well we lost it. Health Services Penis II: It's not here right now, but here's some Sudafed. The Chevy Truck Penis: Like a rock! The Mazda Penis: It just feels right. The Ford Penis: Built Ford tough. The Butterfinger Penis: Nobody better lay a finger on my penis. The Eggo Penis: Leggo my penis. The Skittles Penis: Tatst the penis. The Bic Lighter Penis: Go ahead flic my penis. The Mentos Penis: The Freshmaker! The Jack in the Box Penis: Jack's Back. The Fuji Color Penis: Fine penis for the best color prints.