A husband and wife were getting all snugly in bed. The passion was heating up,
 but all of a sudden, the wife stopped, got up and said, "I don't feel like it.
 I just want you to hold me."

 The husband said, "WHAT?"

 The wife explained that he must not be in tune with her emotional needs. The
 husband realized that nothing was going to happen so he decided that he might
 as well just deal with it.

 The next day the husband said, "Let's go Christmas Shopping together." So they
 went to the most expensive department store in town. The husband watched as
 his wife tried on three very expensive outfits. And then he told his wife,
 "Let's take all three of them."

 Then they went over and picked out matching shoes costing $200 a pair.
 Afterwards, they went to the jewelry department and picked out a set of
 diamond earrings.

 The wife became very excited (she thought her husband has flipped out, but she
 wasn't stopping him). She then went for the tennis bracelet. The husband
 commented, "But you don't even play tennis! But If you like it then let's get
 it."

 The wife was jumping up and down so excited that she could not believe what
 was going on. Her previously miserly husband was suddenly transformed into a
 spendthrift.

 She said, "I am ready to go. Let's go to the cash register."

 The husband says, "No no no, honey. We're not going to buy all this stuff."

 The wife's face went blank; she was utterly confused.

 "No, honey, I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while."

 Her face became really red and she was about to explode when her husband said,
 "You must not be in tune with my financial needs."