1.  The more confidential the memo, the more likely it will be left in the
     copy machine.
 
 2.  The new improved model always appears on the market just after you've
     bought the old model.
 
 3.  The person who suggests spitting the bill evenly is always the person who
     ordered the most expensive items.
 
 4.  The chance of a sudden cloudburst is in direct proportion to the amount of
     suede your're wearing.
 
 5.  The novice poker player will always take home the pot.
 
 6.  You always get sick on the second day of your vacation and always recover
     the day before you return to work.
 
 7.  The odd little noise you ignored all night will turn out to be a major
     disaster.
 
 8.  The only things super stick will bond successfully are your fingers.
 
 9.  When a traffic light gets stuck, you will get the red.
 
 10. If you aren't looking for something you've misplaced, then your're filing
     something you'll never be able to find.
 
 11. "One size fits all" items will never fit you!
 
 12. Your car insurance protects you from everything except what actually
     happens.