There were four guys who were in the final stages of interviewing for a prestigious job. They were from Harvard, Yale, Stanford, and Berkeley. The company decided to fly them all in for dinner and a final interview. Over dinner at a fine restaurant, the president of the company told the men that all were very worthy applicants, and that he wished he could hire them all, but that they only had enough money budgeted to hire one person. He told them that he would call each of them in one at a time for a final interview the next day, and that he would ask each one of them the same question. Whoever answered the question the best would be the one hired. All applicants agreed that this was fair. The next day, the first applicant called in was from Harvard. The president posed the question, "What is the fastest thing in the world?" The young man thought for a moment and replied, "That would have to be a thought." "Why do you say that?" asked the president. "Well, a thought takes no time at all... It is in your mind in an instant, then gone again." "Ahh, very good. Thank you," replied the president. Next the same question was posed to the young man from Yale, "What is the fastest thing in the world?" The young man paused and replied, "That would have to be a blink." "Why?" asked the president. "Because you don't even think about a blink; it's just a reflex. You do it in an instant." The president thanked him, then called in the next person. The young man from Stanford was asked what the fastest thing in the world was, and after hesitating for a brief moment, he replied, "I would have to say electricity. Why? Because a man can flip a switch, and immediately, three miles away a light will go on." "I see. Very good," replied the president. Then, the young man from Berkeley was called in. He, too, was asked, "What is the fastest thing in the world?" "That's easy," he replied. "That would have to be diarrhea!" Rather stunned, the president asked, "Why do you say that?" "Well, last night after dinner, I was lying in my bed and I got the worst stomach cramps... and before I could THINK, BLINK, or TURN ON THE LIGHTS, SHIT came out!!!" (He got the job...)