Helen's husband had a terrible habit of letting go with an absolutely GIGANTIC
fart every time he woke up in the morning. His wife's warnings that one day he
was going to fart his guts right out had no effect on Sam.

One Thanksgiving morning Helen was up early preparing turkey dinner when the
perfect way to stop Sam's disgusting habit came into her head. She took the
giblets from the turkey, snuck into the bedroom, and very carefully dropped
them down the back of Sam's shorts. Sam woke up and cut a huge fart, but when
he rolled over onto his back he felt something strange. Fearing the worst, he
ran into the bathroom, and Helen was gratified to hear a terrifying shriek
through the closed door.

When she came up the stairs to check on him, Sam was white as a ghost and
dripping with sweat. Holding up two fingers, he said, "My God, Helen, you were
right! I farted my guts right out, but by the grace of God and these two
fingers I got 'em all back in!!!"