A drunk Scotsman was walking home from the local pub one night and passed out
by the side of a road. 

Early the next morning a Scottish lass walking by spotted him sleeping 
peacefully under a tree. Wondering what Scotsmen wore under their kilts, she
ventured a quick peek, saw this Scotsman wore nothing, and tied a purple ribbon
around his willy.

Upon waking, the Scotsman felt the urge to relieve himself. Lifting his kilt,
he noticed the purple willy ribbon and exclaimed, "Aye begora mate, I don't
know where ye've been, but I'm happy ye won first prize!"