The Official Ebonics Guide to help whitey translate the negroid-american language into standard English. v4.0 Note: If Jamal wants to get a fucking job, he better know how to speak correct english, not this Negro bullshit... Right On Cracker! Ebonics joke: Knock, knock. Who's there? I B. I B Who? I B Bilingual, whitey. Baby names for negroid males: Jamal, Jerome, Cleophus. Baby names for negroid females: LaShondra, Latisha, Shanaynay. The negroid mind has a common problem with conjugating the verb "to be", so they continue to refer to everything as "be" - I be, You be, She/He/It be, We be, They be. YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYIN? - Used at the end of a sentence. Denotes a request for understanding from the Negroid individual. If you hear this repeatedly in a conversation, tell the Negro to speak properly. Question the Negro's clarity. MUH BITCH IS EATIN' GREENS 'N CORNBREAD - His girlfriend or wife is eating vegetables and cornbread. I GOTTA JET - I must leave at an immediately. The Negro must bail out his girlfriend or wife for selling crack and/or other toxic substances deemed inappropriate, lethal, and/or dangerous to society by the US Government. 10,000 - Used to denote an abscence of an individual. Mainly used to express a desire to leave the premise. I GOT YOUR BACK - Denotes a false sense of protection by one Negro to another. The Negro stating this will often flee the scene in immediate danger because the Negro is known for its footspeed. In other words, the Negro is a fast land mammal and/or homosapien. WHITEY, CRACKER, WHITEBREAD, HONKY - Adjectives used to describe a caucasian individual. There is no need to call the offending Negro a nigger, junglebunny, jigaboo, or porchmonkey. This will just fluxuate into a violent scene and cause harm to you or the offending Negro. DOG - Not the domesticated mammalian which barks. Used to denote other Negros. OG - Old Gangsta. Used in the ghetto. Denotes authority in a territorial gang of Negros. Be aware that the Negro who is an OG is armed and dangerous. The Negro known as an OG will most likely be carrying a firearm (semi-auto), a beeper, and a pager. YO, HOMEY, LET'S PLAY HOOPS - Hello, Good Negro, let us play basketball. Young black males are notorious for playing basketball. In fact, many Negros on welfare buy $200 shoes and hit the court nightly. SMOKE HIM, FOO - Shoot him, friend. Used in ghetto culture to denote a killing of another homosapien. YOU BE TRIPPIN', FOO - Your are paranoid, friend. May have other meanings denoted by monotone in voice, e.g., you fucked up. MY BAD - My mistake. The negroid often makes mistakes. If the negroid is fluent in ebonics, he will certainly use MY BAD. Some southerners have also adopted this phrase because they are equally as stupid as 98% of the negroid population inhabiting English-speaking North America. DISSIN' - Disrespecting a fellow negroid. An insult. Also, TO BE DISSED, YOU DISSIN' ME?, et al. YO MAMA - Your guess is as good as ours. Maybe the negroid finds your mother attractive, or the negroid thinks that by insulting your mother that he is insulting you. Maybe Jamal should take a course in human genetics as insults cannot travels telepathically through mother to child. CHRONIC - Used to denote marijuana. Synonym is used in gangsta rap songs. Marijuana has an adverse effect on the negroid nervous system, possibly giving them chronic bronchial infections. THEY GONNA GET THEY ASS SHOT UP - They are going to be shot repeatedly. The Negroid ghetto culture blatantly encourages violence against rival negros and other races. GAT - Gun. Very Archaic. As known, many young negro males are notorious for owning stolen firearms. THIS SHIT IS WHACK - This situation is not correct. The negro mind cannot articulate a situation from a bowel movement. MUH JIMMY IS WHACKED - My penis is not functioning properly. GET MUH SWERVE ON - Get laid or have sex. Used often by negroid males whose penis is crooked. Negroid males boast about having large penises. Maybe that is why their inertia cause a crooked penis. GET MUH GRUB ON - Eating. The negroid diet usually consists of watermelon, ribs, and fried chicken. The African tribes often ate goat blood and fat. RIDE - Automobile. Many negroid males steal cars and take them for joyrides. This offense is punishable by up to 10 years in jail. DA BOMB - It is the greatest thing since cornbread. Since the negroid americans were not allowed to drop atomic bombs in WWII, they now refer to things they like as the bomb. Too bad radiation didn't filter in the ghetto. I BE HANGIN' IN MUH CRIB - I am sitting in my dwelling. Many negros refer to their domicile as a crib because when breast feeding they often sat in their cribs masturbating to images of their mothers' breasts. WHERE BE DA HOES MANG - Where are the prostitutes, good citizen? Many negros get high on a substance deemed toxic and pick up prostitutes because their wifes and/or girlfriends are pimped by other negros. STEP OFF - Back down. Many negroid americans fall off buildings every year if they are not pushed off of them by fellow negros. STEP OFF denotes a request from one negro to another to please be calm. If the negroes knocked over a 7-11, one negro may be remorseful or nervous. If the negros' hideout is on a building, they might fall off of that building. HOMEY - Friend. One negro may have homo erotic feelings for his friend and want to take him home. Back in the late 70's during the explosion of street gangs, many negros experimented with homosexuality. Another way this phrase could have come about is through crackhouses. Many negros sell crack, so their fellow negros at the crackhouse were known as homeys. G-FUNK/THANG - G denotes gangsta. Since many negroid youth are in gangs, and hardly bath, they smell funky. If someone is called G-THANG, they are often gangsta whores as many young negroid women are gang raped. BRACE YERSELF FOO' - Prepare yourself for anything, my negro friend. It is estimated that a negro is shot every three seconds (what a shame), and the buzzphrase is BRACE YERSELF FOO'. The negro who is shooting says this as he points his firearm at point blank range and shoots the other negro. WORD TO YA MOMMA - I understand what you are saying to me. The reference to a mother denotes a negro's affection for his mother or his friend's mother. Most negro males have fathered 3 children before age 23. WORD UP - Again, I understand. Ebonics grammatic construction usually throws the preposition to the end. If you speak correct English, you know this is incorrect. KICKIN IT WITH THE HONEYS - Staying at home with a negroid woman/women. Many negroid males have sex frequently because their penises are very large. Most negroid males have small brains, so they are compensated with their large penises. KEEPIN IT REAL - I am keeping myself from impurities. In early 1996, the big fad about negroid males was a shaved head. As all of us whities know, the negro fallows whatever the current fad is with foodstamps and welfare. PEEP THIS SHIT - Look at this. Many negros stare at an object aimlessly for minutes or hours. The negro brain processes at 16Mhz/day. LAY BACK IN THE CUT - Sit in the car out of sight. If one negro is robbing the Maxi-Mart and his get-away driver is in the parking lot, the robber will say this to the driver so he will not get nervous when "The Man" comes to arrest them. PEACE OUT - Goodbye until I see you again, be careful where you may go. Again, the negroid construction throws the preposition to the end. Denotes a false sense of caring. The negroid often gets into unsafe situations with other negroids. Crime rate increases, more negros die, while those negros alive proceate. The ratio for negros born to those killed is 3:1. The negroid has a high sperm count. IN DA HOUSE - I am present, commence the activities of crime, fornication, and drug abuse. Many negros go to parties and fornicate, thus driving up the ratio above. WHOP YOUR ASS - I will assault you until I render you unconscious. Denotes a threat from a negro to another negro. Many negros beat each other unconscious everyday and cause many injuries. Whitey has them to thank for health insurance rates going up. HOOD RAT - A whore or nasty woman who lives in the ghetto. Many rats infest the ghetto, as many as the whores that infest the same ghetto. The negroid male has sex with a HOOD RAT every so often, yet cannot rid their ghetto of the actual vermon, even with all of the firearms. KNOCKIN BOOTS - Having sex. Many negroid males sodomize HOOD RATS, SKANKS, HOES, and their mothers. The nasty women who live in the ghetto wear combat boots to stomp on the rats, thus when the negroid males are sodomizing the women, they are "Knockin' boots." THE END Coming Soon: The Spanglish Guide to help you translate Spic into English. The Hillbilly Guide to help you translate those who live in the south and/or in trailers into English.