Two boys are playing football in Golden Gate Park when one is attacked by a
 rabid Rottweiler.  Thinking quickly, the other boy rips off a board of the
 nearby fence, wedges it down the dog's collar and twists, breaking the dog's
 neck.  A reporter who was strolling by sees the incident, and rushes over to
 interview the boy.

 "Young Forty Niners' Fan Saves Friend From Vicious Animal," he starts writing
 in his notebook.
 "But I'm not a Niners fan," the little hero replied.
 "Sorry, since we are in San Francisco I just assumed you were," said the
 reporter and starts again.

 "Little Oakland Raiders' Fan Rescues Friend From Horrific Attack," he
 continued writing in his notebook.
 "I'm not a Raiders fan either," the boy said.
 "I assumed everyone in the Bay Area was either for the Niners or Raiders.
 What team do you root for?" the reporter asked.
 "I'm a Cowboys fan," the child said.

 The reporter starts a new sheet in his notebook and writes, "Little Redneck
 Bastard Kills Beloved Family Pet."