16 Reasons Why a Diet Coke is Better Than a Man
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 A Diet Coke is satisfying all the time.
 You can dump a Diet Coke when you've had enough.
 A Diet Coke generally lasts longer.
 It's available in a variety of sizes.
 You only need one.
 Diet Coke comes in a can, not in your mouth.
 When you swallow a Diet Coke, you only get 1 calorie.
 A Diet Coke doesn't dirty your sheets or dishes.
 A Diet Coke will silently and patiently wait for you.
 You can ignore a Diet Coke for days and it will still be there when you want
   it.
 A Diet Coke respects you as much at night as it does in the morning.
 When you swallow a Diet Coke, it doesn't leave an aftertaste in your mouth.
 People don't talk if you've had 3 or 4 of them.
 No privacy is needed to enjoy a Diet Coke.
 Even if you spill a Diet Coke in bed it won't make you sleep in the wet spot.
 You can have a headache and enjoy it.
 
 7 Reasons Why a Diet Coke is Better Than a Woman
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 A Diet Coke finishes the same time you do.
 A Diet Coke doesn't care if you have other Diet Cokes on the side.
 Diet Coke is always fresh, clean and sweet to put in your mouth.
 A Diet Coke doesn't try to change you.
 A Diet Coke doesn't care if you use a dirty glass.
 Diet Coke will keep you company during the Super Bowl and not ask a lot of
   fool questions.
 A Diet Coke never has a headache.