Police in Washington, D.C. are passing out flyers, warning citizens that a
 registered sex offender is living in their neighborhood.
 
 Commentators now say, Monica Lewinsky is holding the precidency in her hands.
 Coincidentially, that's what Clinton told her, too.
 
 The Oval Office has been renamed to "The Oral Office".
 
 Remember the good old days when politicians called Hollywood upon their
 morals. Well, now Charlie Sheen is going "Shame! Shame!"
 
 Fellow Democrats are coming to Clinton's aid. Ted Kennedy offered to drive her
 home.
 
 After the Superbowl there was an awkward moment when the president called to
 congratulate and John Elway said "What? Al Gore wants to talk to me?"
 
 Monica Lewinsky official title is now "The First Intern".
 
 Monica Lewinsky plans to take the 5th. It caused only trouble when she opened
 her mouth the last time.
 
 Remember the girl from the Dorito commercial during the Superbowl? She did a
 split and caught a dorito with her mouth. Today she was offered an internship
 at the White House.
 
 Bill Clinton's latest excuse is, "But I didn't insert."
 
 I had sex with her, but I didn't ejaculate.
 
 Would You Have Sex With Bill Clinton? 70% of the women polled in Washington DC
 said "never again."

 Titles for Clinton's Biographical Film

 ALL THE PRESIDENT'S WOMEN
 FREE MY WILLY
 GOOD BILL HUNTING
 LIAR, LIAR 2
 THE LYIN' KING
 INTERNS OF ENDEARMENT
 THE "VICE" PRESIDENT
 AFFAIR TO FORGET
 DAYS OF WINE AND BOZOs
 SEX, LIES, AND AUDIO TAPE