Canonical List of Automobile Acronyms

 AUDI
 Accelerates Under Demonic Influence
 Always Unsafe Designs Implemented

 BMW
 Beautiful Mechanical Wonder
 Big Money Works
 Bought My Wife
 Brutal Money Waster

 BUICK
 Big Ugly Indestructible Car Killer

 CHEVROLET
 Can Hear Every Valve Rap On Long Extended Trips
 Cheap, Hardly Efficient, Virtually Runs On Luck Every Time

 DODGE
 Damn Old Dirty Gas Eater
 Drips Oil, Drops Grease, Everywhere

 FIAT
 Failure in Italian Automotive Technology
 Fix It All the Time

 FORD
 backwards --> Driver Returns On Foot First On Recall Day
 First On Rust and Deterioration
 Fix Or Repair Daily
 Found On Road, Dead
 Fault Of R&D
 Fast Only Rolling Downhill
 Features O.J. and Ron's DNA

 GM
 General Maintenance

 GMC
 Garage Man's Companion

 HONDA
 Had One Never Did Again

 HYUNDAI
 Hope You Understand Nothing's Drivable And Inexpensive...

 MAZDA
 Most Always Zipping Dangerously Along

 OLDSMOBILE
 Old Ladies Driving Slowly Make Others Behind Infuriatingly Late Every day.
 Overpriced, Leisurely Driven Sedan Made Of Buick's Irregular Leftover 
 Equipment

 SAAB
 Send Another Automobile Back
 Swedish Automobiles Always Breakdown

 TOYOTA
 Too Often Yankees Overprice This Auto

 VW
 Virtually Worthless