24 Reasons That Bicycles Are Better Than Your Mate

  1. Bicycles don't get pregnant.
  2. You can ride bicycles any time of the month.
  3. Bicycles don't have parents.
  4. Bicycles don't whine unless something is really wrong.
  5. You can share a bicycle with friends.
  6. Bicycles don't care how many other bicycles you have ridden.
  7. When riding, you and your bicycle arrive at the same time.
  8. Bicycles don't mind how many other bicycles you have.
  9. Bicycles don't care if you look at other bicycles.
 10. Bicycles don't care if you buy bicycle magazines.
 11. If your bicycle goes flat you can fix it.
 12. If your bicycle is too loose you can tighten it.
 13. If your bicycle is misaligned you don't have to discuss politics with it.
 14. You can ride other friends' bicycles and still stay friends.
 15. If you say bad things to your bicycle you don't have to apologize before
     you can ride it again.
 16. You can ride your bicycle for as long as you want and it won't get sore.
 17. You can stop riding your bicycle as soon as you want and it won't get
     frustrated.
 18. Your mother won't stay in touch with your bicycle after you dump it.
 19. Bicycles don't get headaches.
 20. Bicycles don't insult you if you are a bad rider.
 21. Bicycles don't care if you are late.
 22. You don't have to take a shower before you ride a bicycle.
 23. You can ride your bicycle the first time you meet it without having to
     take it out to dinner, see a movie, or meet its parents.
 24. When in mixed company you can talk about the great rides you've had.