AMBIGUOUS ADS FROM NEWSPAPERS 1. Now is your chance to have your ears pierced and get an extra pair to take home, too. 2. We do not tear your clothing with machinery. We do it carefully by hand. 3. For Sale - Eight puppies from a German Shepherd and an Alaskan Hussy. 4. Vacation Special: Have your home exterminated. 5. Dinner Special - Turkey $2.35; Chicken or Beef $2.25; Children = $2.00. 6. Stock up and save. Limit: one. 7. Dog for sale: Eats anything and is fond of children. 8. Something Went Wrong In Jet Crash, Expert Says 9. Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers 10. Safety Experts Say School Bus Passengers Should be Belted 11. Drunk Gets Nine Months In Violin Case 12. Survivor of Siamese Twins Joins Parents 13. Farmer Bill Dies In House 14. Iraqi Head Seeks Arms 15. Is There A Ring Of Debris Around Uranus? 16. British Left Waffles On Falkland Islands 17. Lung Cancer in Women Mushrooms 18. Eye Drops Off Shelf 19. Teacher Strikes Idle Kids 20. Squad Helps Dog Bite Victim 21. Reagan Wins on Budget, But More Lies Ahead 22. Shot Off Woman's Leg Helps Nicklaus to 66 23. Enraged Cow Injures Farmer With Axe 24. Plane Too Close To Ground, Crash Probe Told 25. Miners Refuse To Work After Death 26. Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant 27. Stolen Painting Found By Tree 28. Two Soviet Ships Collide, One Dies 29. Two Sisters Reunited After 18 Years In Checkout Counter 30. Never Withhold Herpes Infection From Loved One 31. Include Your Children When Baking Cookies 32. War Dims Hope For Peace 33. If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile 34. Cold Wave Linked To Temperatures 35. Enfields Couple Slain. Police Suspect Homicide 36. Man Struck By Lightning Faces Battery Charge 37. New Study of Obesity Looks For Larger Test Group 38. Astronaut Takes Blame For Gas In Spacecraft 39. Kids Make Nutritious Snacks 40. Chef To Throw Heart into Helping Feed Needy 41. Arson Suspect is Held in Massachusetts Fire 42. British Union Finds Dwarfs in Short Supply 43. Ban On Soliciting Dead In Trotwood 44. Lansing Residents Can Drop Off Trees 45. Local Highschool Dropouts Cut In Half 46. New Vaccine May Contain Rabies 47. Man Minus Ear Waives Hearing 48. Deaf College Opens Door To Hearing 49. Air Head Fired 50. Steals Clock, Faces Time 51. Prosecutor Releases Probe into Undersheriff 52. Old School Pillars are Replaced by Alumni 53. Hospitals are Sued by Seven Foot Doctors