The Top 17 Signs You're Addicted to the Internet
     
17> Any campground without a T1 line is OFF your vacation itinerary.
     
16> Wife calls you to dinner by posting to alt.food.
     
15> I.V. stand next to your mini tower.
     
14> Choice between paying Compuserve bill and paying for kids education is easy
    -- if a little painful for your kids.
     
13> Your big pickup line is, "Haven't we met on alt.top5.addict?"
     
12> Batteries in the TV remote now last for months.
     
11> You send in your jokes@esosoft.com submissions while in the air over
    Oregon.
     
10> You hire a housekeeper for your home page.
     
 9> New mail alarm on your palmtop annoys other churchgoers.
     
 8> Your mouse-clicking forearm rivals Popeye's.
     
 7> AT&T names you Customer of the Month for the third consecutive time.
     
 6> You unsuccessfully try to download a pizza from www.dominos.com.
     
 5> Your family conducts an intervention via e-mail and checks you into
    www.bettyford.com.
     
 4> You rig your toilet to alert you if you receive any new mail while you're
    "off-line."
     
 3> You speak in a monotone voice and call your wife "Friday."
     
 2> You're surprised to learn there's also a 2 o'clock in the *afternoon*.

    and the Number 1 Sign You're Addicted to the Internet...

 1> You're reading THIS, aren't you?